Song: DeVotchKa – All The Sand in All The Sea
You know the feeling, when you finally tap into that bubbling rush of anxiety, your heart fluttering, right before the dreaded task.
Today I decided to face my fears. I submitted to a publisher, I called an Aunt I’ve only met once, and I called a lost friend. It’s not any easier standing in my shoes. It’s a risk, a risk of rejection, but if I don’t do it, then I will never know. I will never test myself or my strength. Though I was scared on all accounts, there was something deep within me saying “Do it! Feel the fear and do it anyway.” I thought about how many days I had wasted letting fear get in the way…
I pile up things in front of me, cleaning my house and every last dish to avoid time pursuing my true passions, because I am scared. It’s a defense mechanism. If we don’t try, then we can’t fail. We’ve all done it, but when do we choose to get out of our own way and allow ourselves to succeed?
Writing was a fear at one time, this blog, owning a business, singing…
And now I have just faced some mores fears — so at the end of the day I can finally say, I have a shot at finding a publisher, a shot at having an Aunt in my life, and a chance at reuniting with a friend.
I think that’s worth a hit to my ego.
♥ Estella Grace